Hurricane Diarrhea #26

“Let me sit beside her, okay?”

“And you will…?”

“Buy you ice cream.”

“Okay.” Taeyeon grinned. She hadn’t expected Yuri to give in so easily. In fact, she had said it in jest but Yuri was so serious that she didn’t see the need to take her words back. Besides, a free ice cream never hurt anybody.

They got to the lecture theatre and Yuri was first in. She headed straight for Jessica, who was easily recognizable by her posture—a head resting on folded arms. Also by the hair that looked like the product of an hour or two under a stylist. Taeyeon had never seen such flawless hair in her life. Until Jessica.

Yuri took the seat next to Jessica and Taeyeon sat beside Yuri. The image of Yuri trying to make conversation with a sleeping Jessica popped into her mind and made her snigger, which earned her a jab from Yuri’s elbow.

“Oww,” groaned Taeyeon, “what was that for?”

“Laughing at my plight.”

“How did y—”

“What else could you be laughing at.”

“What’s going on?” a soft yet sharp voice ended their little exchange and Taeyeon tried to suppress her giggles as Yuri started squeaking again.

“Oh! I’m sorry. Did we wake you?”

“I wasn’t sleeping. I was just resting my eyes.” Jessica didn’t sound too happy to Taeyeon and she could only grin as Yuri squeaked yet again.

“Oh, that’s great! It’s good to rest your eyes. Well-rested eyes are a good thing.”

“I’m sorry, do I know you?”

Taeyeon nearly burst into laughter right there and then but the professor had just stepped in and she had to clap her hands over her mouth to stop herself from attracting unnecessary attention. Ho, ho, ho…this was gold!

“Er…we met? At Taeyeon and Sunny’s apartment?”

Taeyeon popped her head forward and grinned. “Hi, Jessica.”

“Hi.” Jessica frowned after nodding at Taeyeon. “Taeyeon, I know. She’s the girl Tiff is seeing. But you…”

“I showed you where the bathroom was. We sat next to each other during the movie.”

“You…?”

“I’m Yuri. Kwon Yuri.”

“You don’t look like her.”

“What?”

“Yuri.”

“What?” Yuri’s squeak had hit an unprecedented high and Taeyeon would have squeaked too if it were her. Jessica wasn’t making any sense at all.

“That Yuri looks like a shaggy puppy. But you look like a model from a magazine.”

“ARFASKEJFHAHAHAHAHA!” Taeyeon lost it and roared with laughter but it didn’t last for long. “Oww!” Yuri’s foot had connected with her leg and effectively silenced her. It was too late though, for everyone was staring at her.

Shit.

~

“Do you wanna grab lunch with us later?”

Taeyeon’s ears pricked at the mention of ‘lunch with us’. What ‘us’ was Yuri talking about? She was going to have lunch with Tiffany. Their weekly Monday lunches were something she looked forward to besides 2027 and Saturday nights. What ‘us’?

“Us?” Jessica asked and Taeyeon wanted to give her a pat on the back for asking it.

“Taeyeon and I.”

“And Tiffany,” added Taeyeon, her lips curled in disgust at her friend who was about to ruin her alone time with the girl she couldn’t wait to see.

“Oh, Tiff’s gonna be there?”

“Yes,” squeaked Yuri and Taeyeon winced. That high pitched voice was starting to get to her and she wanted to hit Yuri’s head really hard to stop it.

“Mmm…okay.”

“Great!” squeaked Yuri and Taeyeon could only shake her head. If Yuri was going to squeak like this during lunch, she was going to drag Tiffany away and go somewhere far away from her.

Seriously.

~

“Hi Tae…yeon…” Tiffany’s initial joyous tone turned into a surprised one when she realized Taeyeon wasn’t alone. Turning to Jessica, she asked, “What are you doing here?”

Jessica merely shrugged, a whisper of a smile playing on her lips as her head singled Yuri out. “She invited me.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be home?”

Another lazy shrug. “After lunch.”

“Are you trying to spy on us?”

Jessica snorted. “Spies hide behind trees.”

“You know what I mean.”

“No.”

Tiffany’s eyes narrowed into slits and she shook her head.

“Trust me. Oh my God.”

The two girls sparred with their eyes for a moment before Tiffany finally sat down beside Taeyeon.

“So what are we having for lunch?” asked Yuri, eyes bright and happy. “Lunch’s on me today!”

“Bulgogi burger with extra large fries for her and a chicken burger for me.”

Taeyeon grinned, happy to let Tiffany place an order for her. Hearing how Tiffany took charge of her order made her want so badly to kiss her too. Darn it, Kwon Yuri.

~

The whole situation was kind of awkward. She was itching to kiss Tiffany. Tiffany was sitting too close to her. Yuri was yakking away about some random topic that didn’t make any sense. Jessica was half-asleep. Taeyeon munched on her burger, having finished her fries and wondered how she could make her escape with Tiffany. Then, Jessica’s head tilted and Taeyeon watched, as she leaned on Yuri and fell fast asleep.

Yuri turned into a slab of stone, frozen stiff from the unexpected turn of events, jaw hanging loose and Taeyeon thought she had never looked more ridiculous in her life. At the same time, she couldn’t blame Yuri either. Nobody would have expected Jessica to fall asleep on her shoulder in the middle of lunch.

“Is she really asleep?” Taeyeon whispered although the ambient noise level was way higher than her voice.

“Yes.”

“But…she’s eating…”

“It’s her nap time.”

“Huh?”

“Usually, she’ll head back home for a nap after the lecture. I really don’t know what possessed her to join us for lunch.”

“She really sleeps a lot,” remarked Yuri, her eyebrows raised high and Tiffany giggled.

“Why else do you think she’s called the sleeping beauty?”

“What else does she do besides sleep?”

“Read.”

“And…?”

Tiffany thought for a bit. “Homework.”

“That’s it?” Taeyeon couldn’t help interrupting.

“That’s it.”

Taeyeon locked gazes with Yuri. Both of them were rendered speechless for a moment. Jessica was weirder than they’d thought. So much weirder.

No shit.

~

Jessica woke up after a while, confused about where she was.

“What happened?” she asked and Taeyeon could only gape as Tiffany giggled.

“You fell asleep on Yuri’s shoulder.”

Jessica looked at Yuri, smiling in such a shy way that made it impossible for anyone to rebuke her for what she did. “Sorry.”

Yuri, to no surprise, grinned from ear to ear. “You’re welcome to sleep on my shoulder anytime.”

Taeyeon rolled her eyes. Yuri the Charming disgusted her. She had seen it one too many times to stomach it anymore. But her disgust turned into suppressed laughter when Jessica replied matter-of-factly, “Your shoulder isn’t as comfy as my pillow but thanks for the offer.”

Taeyeon could literally see Yuri’s shoulders drooping low and if Yuri had a tail, it’d be tucked between her legs now; her disappointment was so apparent.

“Are we done with lunch? I’d like to go home and take a proper nap if we are.”

“We’re done,” answered Tiffany and Jessica nodded as she stood up.

“Bye, girls.” Yuri stood with Jessica and the latter stared at her blankly.

“You’re leaving too?”

“I have to leave since I’m sending you home.”

“Why?”

“Must there be a reason?”

Jessica shrugged and Yuri grinned, slipping her arm around the girl’s shoulders as though she owned them. Jessica did nothing to stop her and her grin grew wider.

“Bye Taengoo. Bye Tiffany.”

And with a casual wave of her hand, Yuri sauntered out of the burger place with Jessica.

“Finally.”

Taeyeon blinked. Finally? What?

Tiffany got up from her seat. “Let’s go.”

“Where are we going?”

“My place of course.”

“But aren’t we supposed to go shopping?”

“I want to go home for a bit. Take a quick shower.”

“Oh, alright.”

~

Taeyeon wondered what Tiffany was up to. She was rather quiet as she drove them both back to her apartment, which was unusual. There were no questions, no comments, no nothing. Uh oh. Was something wrong?

Tiffany’s angry. Is she? Maybe? I dunno. Why would she be angry? Did I do anything wrong? Yuri? Is she angry because Yuri and Jessica joined us? Is that it?

The car came to a stop and Taeyeon was more nervous than ever. Tiffany’s quiet was a lot louder than her chatter. Holy cow. They entered Tiffany’s apartment and Taeyeon removed her shoes. Her socks however…

“Don’t forget your socks.”

“Uh…”

“Prince won’t pee on them again.”

“How do you know?”

“Cos I scolded him.”

“But…”

“Take them off. I can’t kiss you if you’ve got your socks on.”

“Why not?”

“Cos you’d look too funny and I’ll keep laughing.”

Taeyeon didn’t know if Tiffany was being serious or not but she decided to take her socks off anyway. Especially if her socks were going to rob her of Tiffany’s kisses. No way. She walked to the couch barefooted but Tiffany stopped her.

“Where are you going?”

“Er…the couch?”

“Taeyeon honey, don’t be silly. You’re coming into my bedroom with me. Now.”

“But I wanna watch some TV while you shower.”

Tiffany giggled and shook her head. “Aren’t you supposed to join me in the shower?”

Everything in Taeyeon’s world went silent right then. Every inch of her body stilled. Every thought paused. Had she heard it right? Shower? Did it mean she had to take off all her clothes? But she wasn’t prepared for this. Oh why, oh why hadn’t it occurred to her that their date might end up like this? She’d planned for going shopping with Tiffany. Not this. And as she stood there, gaping at Tiffany, she racked her brains to recall which lingerie set she had worn today.

SpongeBob.

Oh, shit.

~

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